x

I tried to be better, but look at me, look at me now, I'm so fucking weak. All I ever think is to end this. There's no reason to be alive. There's no reason to stop this. I was meant to be like this. I was meant to be sick. I was meant to be death. I wonder if god care, he see me every time when i'm out of control. He see me cutting my flesh and my blood drop on the floor. He see me cry and scream every night. He see me when I'm shivering and being mad. He see me waking up from my sleep and crying for everything to stop. He even see how a messed I am living here. I wonder if god care , He will take me from here, He will end my pain, He will make me die.

So I wont have the thought every night thinking of the way how to die and what my death will look like.